Lavender and bubbles
Reading the title of this post you may be thinking ‘This must be a post about relaxing and kicking back’….um, no. Quite the contrary.
It’s been a few months now and my son continues to wake up on the middle of the night – once, twice, thrice. ‘It’s a phase’ they tell me. ‘He’ll grow out of it’ they say. I know this. I realize it’s a phase.
It’s tiring. It’s exhausting. It’s borderline guantanamo bay style sleep deprivation. It freakin sucks.
Ok, now that the rant is over, I’ll be adult about it. It still sucks. I’m angry my son isn’t sleeping through the night. I’m scared something is wrong in that little body of his. I’m sad because the sleep deprivation is taking a toll on practically every moment of my day.
Being a conscious man I realize in a few moments from now this will be over and the next ‘phase’ will come its way. As a parent I have come to learn when a stage is over, it only makes room for the next one – with the previous preparing you for the next (or at least we hope).
So where do the lavender and bubbles come in you ask? Well, that’s part of the new bedtime regimen. A nice warm bubble bath with a drop or two of lavender. Nice warm jammies. Lavender rub on his feet and a final shot of a lavender/water monster spray mix that keeps all nighttime-nasties at bay (did I mention the lavender :)).
It’s a bit better. He’s beginning to feel safer in his room and beginning to find comfort in the dark.
I remember times as a boy when every single noise would spook me and any light movement would produce shadows on my wall that I swore were a hundred feet tall. I remember the fear. It was quite overwhelming.
So, as a parent, as a conscious father, there’s the balance between being empathetic and being stern. There’s no real answer for any of this in any book – only suggestions that, if researched enough, could drive you mad. There’s only the now and the experiences I bring as both a boy and an adult.
For now we weather the storm and do what we can to bring a calm, understanding approach to this phase.
That’s what being adult is, right?
Perhaps, tonight, as I lay in his bed reading The Adventures of Lowly Worm, the calmness of my voice will work together with the lavender rubbed on his feet and he’ll have a good, long nights sleep.
I can dream, can’t I?